April 27, 2018

Below is a post from 3 years ago. I was on day 10 of 12 days of “face-down” time following eye surgery - and it was getting a little tedious. I was ready to move on! I was so glad that we were just about finished with all cancer/eye issues and I could get back to MY life, not this crazy one!!  🙂 Fast forward 3 years; life does not look at ALL like I thought it would by now. And that is a good thing in so many ways!! 

At times it is challenging, but I wouldn’t trade the lessons I have learned and continue to learn, the reliance on God and His plans, and the peace and JOY that He gives as I learn to give Him control and trust Him for the outcome. I am so blessed with incredible family and friends. God does have the perfect plan for our lives. 🙂

“I know the plans I have in mind for you, declares the LORD; they are plans for peace, not disaster, to give you a future filled with hope. When you call me and come and pray to me, I will listen to you.” Jeremiah‬ ‭29:11-12‬ ‭CEB‬‬

APRIL 27, 2015

This IS the Plan??

Tony Boyd and I were talking today about how it's sometimes good that we don't know what the future holds - that it would have been overwhelming if we had known ahead of time what these last six months would bring. 

As we were talking, I was thinking about what I would have been doing and working on, if all these medical things hadn't happened - if I hadn't had all this DOWN time.  🙂 As I was thinking, it was as if God was saying to me, "This IS my plan. There is nothing more important for you to do than what you've been doing." 

WHAT?? Even though I've talked about how this isn't a surprise to God, and that He would be glorified through this journey, I don't know that I have ever considered that this was God's PLAN for this part of my life. But when I look at it from that perspective - that this is what my purpose is right now, to give Him glory and to point people to Him during the unexpected detour, I felt a huge relief. He has allowed us time to get to know Him on a deeper level, and He has provided everything we have needed. 

It is all about perspective - and I will continue to CHOOSE JOY!!

April 26, 2018 - Great Day at the Eye Doctor!

I had a check-up today at the eye specialist and it was good! My doctor was very pleased and showed me scans from today and three weeks ago. Today’s scan showed that the fluid under my retina has decreased from 367 microns to 285 microns since the last injection - a change of 82 microns. 🙂 I don’t know what all that means but he said that is a significant decrease in fluid and it is absolutely a step in the right direction. He wants to keep doing injections every four weeks with the goal of drying up all the fluid - but there hasn’t been this much improvement before, so he was very encouraged. 🙂 Me too!!

Monday is a big day with several tests to sort out what’s causing balance issues. I am so encouraged to have a good news day!! Thanks to all our friends and family for your prayers for us. 

April 21, 2018

I am doing well - not driving, taking it easy and settling into this new season! And I love this devo!

“Here is the Bible’s description of who a Christian is: “We [are those who] have this treasure in jars of clay.” What treasure? The glorious gospel: the work of Jesus Christ to save sinners by grace through faith. And what is clay? A brittle, easily broken substance. And that’s what I am. That’s what you are.

God has a purpose in placing such a treasure in such a jar. We are unfit, breakable, disposable vessels, and God has decided to use our weaknesses to display his power and love. A jar of clay might be cracked in a few places, making it unusable in the world’s eyes, but God sees these deficiencies as a means to pour out and reveal more of himself.” - Hope When It Hurts, You Version

April 19, 2018

God’s timing is mind-blowing. In our THRIVE study last night, we talked about how God uses His Word to speak to us in different ways at different times. 

After planning on a week of no doctor appointments, I have had two, with more scheduled for testing to determine what’s up with my balance. Apparently this balance/falling down issue isn’t going to be a quick fix. And while they are sorting it out, I asked “If you were me, would you drive right now?” The reply was probably not. I already haven’t been driving at night but I “tried out” not driving yesterday - and it is hard to rely on other people!! I love my sweet friends who are willing to help but I do not like being dependent. I did not feel very joyful - and I just happened to be wearing my “Choose Joy” shirt as I was crying at the doctor’s office and at THRIVE. 😂😁😥😭😁

This was my devo this morning: 

“Two are better than one, Because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, For he has no one to help him up.” Ecclesiastes‬ ‭4:9-10‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

It continues on: “I was raised to be independent, and just like toddlers, I wanted to do things “by myself.” I was diagnosed with cancer a few years ago, and I determined to be the strong one. I didn’t want my family or friends to worry, so I did not show my fear. I let people know that I could handle the trips to get treatments on my own; I didn’t need anyone to go with me. But too soon, I started to crumble. I really thought I could handle this by myself. I was wrong. Yes, I prayed. Yes, I spoke the truth of God’s Word. But I needed something else. I needed the support of other people in order to find my brave.” Holly Wagner, Find Your Brave

I’ve read the verse so many times - but never thought about it in the literal context of falling. The devo goes on to talk about how we don’t need to be alone and the importance of relationship and community. Things I KNOW but apparently needed to be reminded of this week!!

God knows where we are and what we are dealing with. Even when we are mad or sad or discouraged. He is putting people in our lives to walk with, sometimes so we can bless them - and sometimes so they can be a blessing to us. 

Thank you, God, for the reminders in the difficult seasons!! 😁

April 18, 2018

God knows where we are and what we are dealing with. That is not a newsflash but sometimes we need a reminder!

My local friends know that the last few days have been long ones. I have been really dizzy and after falling for the second time in a few days (and not hurting anything but my elbow and pride), I have been frustrated. Between ear and eye problems, as well as a change in medicines due to blood pressure issues, I have been tired and sad and sick of all of this stuff. 

The thing that has comforted me has been scripture. In word, in song, in prayers and encouragement from Godly friends. Today I started working on my THRIVE homework and about jumped out of my chair as I read about “The Living Word.” These words were so timely: “If the Word of God doesn’t seem to work for you or you see things in the Word that just don’t seem to happen, remember that God is not looking for your understanding or even your cooperation; He’s looking for your obedience.” Then there was a question, asking when have I experienced the rhema (revealed) Word of God; I could say RIGHT NOW! And I looked back on the scriptures that have spoken truth to me in the last few days. I don’t know all the answers but I do know the one who does!! He loves each of us and calls each of us by name as his beloved children! We can rest in that assurance. 

By the way - thank you for all the prayers and texts and messages over the last few days. I am doing much better!!

“And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.”
‭‭Philippians‬ ‭4:19‬ ‭NLT‬‬

April 17, 2018

“Are you in the middle of a situation in which hope seems lost? Maybe you have lost your job. Or your husband had an affair. Or you can’t seem to kick that addiction. Or your child continues to struggle at school. Or you’ve heard the word cancer from your doctor. Or you wonder if the secret dream in your heart will ever come to pass. How is hope possible? The Old Testament prophet Jeremiah has an answer:

“But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. "The Lord is my portion," says my soul, "therefore I will hope in him."”
‭‭Lamentations‬ ‭3:21-24‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Sometimes the bravest thing you can do is to keep hoping. Oftentimes, to keep a grip on hope will take both hands.... You are being made stronger with every wave, and this storm is not bigger than God inside you. His name is Immanuel—God with us. He is not just the God up in heaven watching aloofly as His people suffer. No. He is with me. He is with you. In every moment.” ‘ Holly Wagner, “Find Your Brave”

April 15, 2018

“He is the same God at the sunny apex of the mountain as He is in the foggy, mucky valley. His goodness is not shaken because our circumstances seem gray. Words like “never” or “impossible” hold no power over Him. He sees our wounds and our hopes and our fears and our needs. He reigns, still absolutely sovereign, as we sit in the waiting room of life.” - Jess Connell

“The minute I said, ‘I’m slipping, I’m falling,’ your love, GOD, took hold and held me fast. When I was upset and beside myself, you calmed me down and cheered me up.” Psalm‬ ‭94:16-19‬ ‭MSG‬‬

“But when I am afraid, I will put my trust in you.” Psalms‬ ‭56:3‬ ‭NLT‬‬