Feelings of inadequacy...

I am relatively new to the title of “Grammy”.  

My daughters like to do things at the same time - they began this trend by getting married eight weeks apart - which was actually a lot of fun!  Kelli and John had Clara in June 2007; Mindy and Michael had Tucker in September 2007.  Kelli and John welcomed Lincoln in September 2008, so we went from no grandkids to three in 15 months!  And by the way, I didn’t think I would be one of those grammies who talked about their grandkids non-stop, but anyone who spends any time with me knows that’s not true - I am quick to tell a story of something cute they’ve done, or to pop out my laptop or iphone to show you the latest cute picture! 

I was eating lunch with one of my grammy friends the other day, and she said, “Do you ever feel like you are in competition with (the other) grandparents?”  I hadn’t really thought about it much, because I am not frequently around my grandkids’ other grandparents.  But the more I did think about it about it, I realized that if I start to do the comparison, I can feel intimidated.  On the “grammy” scale, I don’t measure up in several areas:

1. I am NOT a cook.  My grandkids will not remember me for my delicious home-cooked meals.  If I compare myself to the other grammies in their lives, I will rate in last place!  Instead, I’m likely to suggest a lovely meal out - cooking makes me nervous!
2. I am not a morning person - I am not going to be the first one awake in the house, making home-made pancakes, cinnamon rolls, etc.  Pop-tarts and cold cereal are the more likely breakfast fare.
3. I am not a seamstress, nor am I gifted in crafts.  My grandchildren will not look back fondly at the beautiful smocked outfits I made, the blankets I knitted, the incredible holidays crafts we created together.
4. I am not a scrap booker.  I do not have the latest photos of my grandkids neatly organized in keepsake volumes.  As I mentioned above, I keep their pictures on the computer, the phone, and facebook!

I can be pretty competitive, so the realization that I may not “measure up” in grammy skills is a little disheartening, and reminds me of other areas in life where I have felt like I don’t quite measure up.  No matter our age - junior high, high school, as young moms - and as GRANDMOTHERS (who would have thought it???), we want to be "winners" - but we tend to go into a room, compare ourselves to others and focus on our weaknesses, the places we don’t measure up, instead of embracing the gifts that God has given us.

God has something to say about this!  Ephesians 2:10 says “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”  God’s plan is not for us to live in a constant state of comparison.  He created each one of us individually - we are His handiwork!  

So I may not be the best cook on the block, but there are other experiences that I can share with my grandkids.  Like their grammy and pop, they all seem to have a love for music and silly dancing. And even though Clara is only three, she has definitely inherited her grammy’s love for shoes and we have already shared shopping trips where we have explored the virtues of shoes with sequins or bows!!  

At the end of the day, what I remember most about my grandmothers is not so much the things they did for me, but how much they loved me, how proud they were of me, and how much they prayed for me.  We can do those things for our children and  grandchildren. The best gift we can give our families this Christmas?  To love them, to appreciate their unique personalities, to pray for them, and to enjoy each day that we have to share with them.

Thanks for taking this journey with me!