The last week has been the most difficult week of my journey through cancer. The repetition of the chemo cycle - infusion, slowing down, pain, medication, sadness - has become familiar to me. This time, maybe because I knew what was coming, I dreaded it more.
Physical weakness is difficult because when your body is tired, your mind is tired, and things can become distorted. That's where I found myself earlier this week. Knowing that God is with me, but feeling frustration at my physical and emotional frailties. Almost like an inexperienced pilot trying to navigate a small plane with visual flight rules instead of instruments - it is very possible that perspective becomes skewed.
AT THOSE MOMENTS IN OUR LIVES, WE NEED A COMPASS.
God and His Word are the compass that we need. They are clear direction when life is confusing, and they are not distorted. For anyone who feels that they have lost their way - the answer is there if we are willing to embrace Him. When we are hard on ourselves, He is there, waiting to shower us with mercy, grace, peace, and strength for each day.
Margaret Feinberg, a fellow breast cancer traveler, has written a book called "Fight Back With Joy." Her words resonate with me today:
"I know now that without shadows, joy can feel shallow. But, when we can discover joy while in the fight of our lives—no matter what that is—it is lasting.
Today, trust when it makes no sense?
Today, seek His presence when He feels so far away?
Today, fight back with joy?
Everyone who has faced a challenge, or who knows someone in the midst, needs to know that —
suffering doesn’t win.
Joy wins."
Somebody needs that reminder tonight. So thankful for a God who loves us and walks with us through each day. He is with us, and He is good.
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