January 13, 2019

Today was such a great day! I absolutely loved our message at church.

Patrick Conrad shared such a great word about living our lives on purpose. I was saying “that’s right” and “amen” so many times I probably aggravated the people around me!  🙂 

The reason I loved it so much was because THIS is the key to the peace and joy that I have found in this season of life. I was blessed to have a mom who, when she was dying of cancer, stressed to her 35-year-old daughter the importance of living a life of significance and of investing in things that are eternal. Hearing our message today reminded me again of how very important it is that we are teaching THIS lesson to our children. They pay attention to our actions much more than just the words that we say. We can spend so much time focused on this life - our careers, homes, etc., when as Pastor Patrick said, we are doing “major remodels on a six-month lease”. We invest so much time, effort and worry into the things that will be gone in no time. 

The fact is, I have cancer. And I had a great visit to the doctor last week. And God Can! Whatever He wants to happen in my life, will happen. But the fact for all of us is, this life is temporary. None of us will live forever here, this is the “short-term” destination and the only thing that matters here is that we live with significance as we prepare for our eternal lives. 

If I can accomplish one thing in my life, my goal is to express and live out this message. We need to do the things that matter, that are eternal. Make sure that when this life is over, we have something eternal to show for our time here. 

James 4:14, “Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.” 

"Celebrate God all day, every day. I mean, revel in him! Make it as clear as you can to all you meet that you're on their side, working with them and not against them. Help them see that the Master is about to arrive. He could show up any minute! Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life." - Philippians 4:4-7 (The Message)

January 10, 2019 - Great Report at CTCA!

We have had a GREAT TRIP!!

PET scan showed decreases in tumor and lymph node sizes!! Tumor markers and other blood work looks great. Dr. McKnight said “congratulations” several times. He also said that I was blessed, that things look very good and there’s no reason to think that will change in the indefinite future. 🙂 Then I cried. Then we had a good talk and he said leave the worrying to him and his team. Then he hugged us both. We are so thankful for our doctor and thiscenter. 

We will keep on what we are doing med-wise and I’ll come back monthly so they can keep monitoring. We are gonna go out to dinner to celebrate! Thanks for praying for us! And please continue praying for friends who are in the fight of their lives as they deal with cancer. This is not an easy road. 

“But you will not even need to fight. Take your positions; then stand still and watch the Lord’s victory. He is with you, O people of Judah and Jerusalem. Do not be afraid or discouraged. Go out against them tomorrow, for the Lord is with you!” 2 Chronicles‬ ‭20:17‬ ‭NLT‬‬

January 9, 2019 - Carol McLeod

“What is joy after all? Is there a definition that can begin to describe the intensity of this simple, miraculous word? I think not ... but perhaps there is an infinite number of meanings found in the Word of God for this powerful word that makes all of the difference in a Christian's life!

• Joy is the peace that passes understanding.

• Joy is the crowd of witnesses that is cheering wildly for you!

• Joy is the knowledge that nothing can separate you from the love of God.

• Joy is angels on a hillside over Bethlehem one starry night.

• Joy is a stream in the desert and a way in the wilderness.

• Joy is His miraculous, unquenchable presence in my ordinary life.” Carol McLeod

“But let all who take refuge in you rejoice; let them sing JOYFUL praises forever. Spread your protection over them, that all who love your name may be filled with JOY.” Psalms‬ ‭5:11‬ ‭NLT‬‬

January 8, 2019 - Trip to CTCA

Tony and I head to Georgia early in the morning for a PET scan tomorrow afternoon. We’ll see the oncologist and have blood work (including tumor markers) and some other appointments on Thursday. They scheduled the PET scan in December when I was last there; it’s a regularly scheduled scan and I didn’t give it much thought until the last few days. I’ve heard people who have to get regular scans talk about “scanxiety”, and I am definitely fighting that tonight. 

This verse came to mind as I was thinking and praying; I am thankful for the comfort it brings and we are claiming the peace of God to guard our hearts and minds!! Thank you for your prayers for us. We will let you know how things go later this week! 

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians‬ ‭4:6-7‬ ‭NIV‬‬

January 6, 2019 - Sue Sewell

I love what Sue Sewell says. And it applies to cancer - but it really applies to anything in our life that we try to control or handle on our own. 🙂

“Is there anyone out there who really believes they can control their cancer? We can try and we can do some good things, but control, no. When we are able to relinquish our ‘illusion’ of control to God, He is able to do far more with our lives than when we are busy ‘directing traffic’. That trust is translated into peace that affects all those we come in contact with. Trust becomes something that is visible, almost tangible—visible in our smile, our prayer, our conversation, our sickness, our losses or gains, our sorrow and our testimony. Yes, trust and faith are interchangeable. They overlap and they change lives. When you find that place of total trust, all of the surgery, treatment, and unknown future become simply a journey to walk with the Lord." - Sue Sewell

“But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him. They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.” Jeremiah 17:7-8 | NIV

January 5, 2019 - This Day

This video isn’t the greatest - but I love this song and its message!!

“This day is fragile; soon it will end
And once it has vanished, it will not come again
So let us love with a love pure and strong
Before this day is gone

This day is fleeting; when it slips away
Not all our money can buy back this day
So let us pray that we might be a friend
Before this day is spent

Chorus
This day we're given is golden
Let us show love
This day is ours for one moment
Let us sow love

This day is frail; it will pass by
So before it's too late to recapture the time
Let us share love; let us share God
Before this day is gone”

Point of Grace - "This Day"

January 4, 2019

Today was a unique day. I had an appointment to get blood work and some other medical stuff handled. I met with someone in the practice that I had never met before, which meant going through a more detailed medical history than normal. And just a note - other than being tired and having some bone pain, I feel great right now. The medical provider was surprised at how much has happened in the last few years. It does sound like a lot when you say it all at once - it was funny because I was talking about eye injections and his response was “wow, you have been through more in the last four years than most people deal with in 20 years.” 

Then the medical provider asked if it was okay to share a scripture and pray with me. I said “Sure!” And then had a chance to tell him how God had been with me every step on this journey and I had learned more about His love for me in this season than I ever have before. The man said, “I could tell you were a believer just by the way you were sharing your history; you were so calm and upbeat about it.” He then said that it had been a blessing working with me. 

This was the verse that He shared:

“The faithful love of the Lord never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.” Lamentations‬ ‭3:22-23‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Such a great reminder of how God is with us, no matter where we find ourselves. As I read this devo and verse tonight, I was reminded again that we have a choice in how we respond to our circumstances, and God will use it for good if we will let Him. 

“When you choose to defy the enemy with the joy that Jesus died to give you, you will become a powerful force in the world today. God can use joyful Christians who are bold enough to hang onto their joy no matter what is going on in their circumstances.” - Carol McLeod

“But let all who take refuge in you rejoice; let them sing joyful praises forever. Spread your protection over them, that all who love your name may be filled with joy.” Psalms‬ ‭5:11‬ ‭NLT‬

January 1, 2019

I hope that your holidays have been restful and that you’ve had time to regroup and relax. We have had such fun with our family! And now, it’s back to reality. 

Eye injection for me tomorrow, another doctor appointment on Friday, and back to Georgia for a PET scan next week. A friend just messaged me about her major surgery in the morning. So many friends and family members dealing with serious issues in their lives. 

Life is hard. There are lots of ups and downs that we can’t see coming. 

Pastor Patrick’s message this past weekend was so perfect for the new year, as he focused on the phrase “God Can”. And He can!! That thought ties so well with my devotion today (thank you for the wonderful gift, Ken Bradleyand Patty Roberts Bradley!!). Here’s a part of it: 

“You have the promise that God will never let you down, that He will be with you every day of the new year to lead you and help you, that He Himself will strengthen you whenever you need extra strength, that He will hold you tight with His own hand and will help and protect you.” 

Those are just some of the many things that God can and will do for us. I am thankful as we go into the new year that we are not alone and that He is with us!

“For I hold you by your right hand - I, the Lord your God. And I say to you, ‘Don’t be afraid. I am here to help you.” Isaiah‬ ‭41:13‬ ‭NLT‬‬

December 31, 2018 - Joy

I’m not a person who has a word for the year on a regular basis. A couple of years ago, I felt like the word “fearless” kept coming into my mind, and looking back, it was a good reminder. 

But this year is different. I have obviously come to love the word “Joy” and the phrase “Choose Joy” over the last few years but recently I feel like God is saying, “you’ve only scratched the surface of what I want to teach you.” Like I’m in 1st Grade Joy and He wants me to move to graduate level.

Looking at the verse below - there’s no action required to be filled with Joy other than loving the name of God. I can start at the wrong place so easily, thinking it’s up to me to find joy within myself rather than finding it in my walk with God. But instead:

Joy = Resting in Him

“But let all who take refuge in you rejoice; let them sing joyful praises forever. Spread your protection over them, that all who love your name may be filled with joy.” Psalms‬ ‭5:11‬ ‭NLT‬‬

December 29, 2018 - Melanie Dale

I’ve been continuing to read “It’s Not Fair: Learning to Love the Life You Didn’t Choose” by Melanie Dale. The book is really unique and I can relate to a lot of what she discusses as she asks questions that many of us ask regarding why God allows suffering, allows bad things to happen to people. Then I read a post that our daughter shared relating to returning to America after almost three years out of the country. The suffering she and her family see on a regular basis is much different than what many people experience in the US - but again it’s a question of processing why things happen. And I don’t begin know the answers. But I do know this:

God sees things from a perspective that is so different than my limited, finite, human perspective. He knows what we are all dealing with. He weeps WITH us, as Pastor Tim shared last weekend. And His plans are for good for us - bigger picture than this temporary situation in which we currently find ourselves. 

In the book, Melanie Dale quotes another author, Philip Yancey, and I love these words!!

“The fact that Jesus came to earth where he suffered and died does not remove pain from our lives. But it does show that God did not sit idly by and watch us suffer in isolation. He became one of us. Thus, in Jesus, God gives us an up-close and personal look at his response to human suffering. All our queries about God and suffering should, in fact, be filtered through what we know about Jesus.” 

That is the real gift of Christmas for me this year. Yes, a baby was born. But what that baby did as He grew into someone just like us - and how He lived and died in the most “unfair” of circumstances - reminds me that He can most certainly be trusted with my circumstances!!  🙂

“The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.” John‬ ‭10:10‬ ‭NLT‬‬

December 28, 2018 - Bob Goff

“The way we deal with uncertainty says a lot about whether Jesus is ahead of us leading, or behind us just carrying our stuff.” - Bob Goff

December 28, 2018 - Kay Warren

“If we are going to experience joy in this lifetime, there’s only one possible way: we will have to choose it. We will have to choose it in spite of unbelievable circumstances. We will have to choose it in the middle of a situation that seems too hard to bear. We will have to choose it even if our worst nightmare comes true.” Kay Warren 

I look up to Kay Warren. She faced her worst nightmare - the suicide of her son - and went on to write a book about choosing joy. I thought I understood joy - but in 2018, I have learned about joy on a new level as I have faced a stage 4 cancer diagnosis. What I have seen again and again this year is that joy is such a powerful weapon against anything that satan tries to throw at us!

We can focus on fear, wondering and worrying about how life will all work out - or we can thank God for the incredible blessings that He has given, and we can trust that He has our lives in His hands.

I am overwhelmed with all the kind birthday greetings. Thank you so much - you’ve made this day even better! But if there is anything I want people to know or remember about me, it is that I pointed them towards the one and only source of joy and strength - Immanuel, God with us!!

“Let all that I am praise the Lord; with my whole heart, I will praise His holy name. Let all that I am praise the Lord; may I never forget the good things He does for me.” ‭‭Psalms 103:1-2

December 25, 2018 - Christmas

“Thank you, Lord. How could I ask for more?”

An absolutely priceless day with our girls and their families, Tony’s parents and John’s mom. I am thankful. 💕

Merry Christmas from Tony and Kathy!!

December 24, 2018 - Breath of Heaven

Christmas is such a special time of year, and I can't wait to celebrate with our family! But I also am aware this year of the truth of Christmas - that God chose a "regular person" - Mary - to bring His son into this world, because of His love for us! I am so thankful for the happy, exciting and fun moments that this season brings - and I am so grateful for the gift of God's son, who came to earth for our salvation and for our healing. Merry Christmas!

"I have traveled many moonless nights
Cold and weary with a babe inside
And I wonder what I've done
Holy father you have come
And chosen me now to carry your son

I am waiting in a silent prayer
I am frightened by the load I bear
In a world as cold as stone
Must I walk this path alone?
Be with me now
Be with me now

Breath of heaven
Hold me together
Be forever near me
Breath of heaven
Breath of heaven
Lighten my darkness
Pour over me your holiness
For you are holy
Breath of heaven"

Amy Grant - Breath of Heaven

December 22, 2018

This has been a wonderful week. So fun spending time with family! In the last seven days, some or all of us have been to 1) Rudolph the Musical, 2) Cedar Hill Farm, 3) Starry Nights and 4) Zoo Lights. Tomorrow, we celebrate Graham’s birthday and then spend Christmas all together for the first time since 2014/2015 (we were together right after Christmas in 2015 so that was almost the same!!). Wow! That’s a lot to be thankful for!!

But in between all the fun, I have also been a little sad, or maybe more reflective. Part of it is being tired (I’m at the end of 21 days of the chemo pill; 7 days off before starting again, and I’ve spent the day in bed, trying to rest up for this week). Part of it is wondering how many more Christmas holidays we will all spend together. 

I can dwell on that thought (and after all - none of us know the answer to that question!). OR, I can be thankful for the gift of this season. I don’t want to waste it on things that don’t matter - I want to treasure and take in every moment of this time we spend together. I would encourage you to do the same! Most of the things we stress over at this time of year, really aren’t worth the worry.

I read these verses tonight and they encouraged me. I’m thankful for all the blessings in my life and the mercy that God has shown us!

"For the Mighty One is holy, and he has done great things for me.  He shows mercy from generation to generation to all who fear him."  Luke 1:49-50

December 19, 2018 - Joy

"When we look continually in faith to Jesus, not at our circumstances, we will find a tranquility within, no matter what is happening around us."

You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You. (Isaiah 26:3 NKJV)

These words have been a comfort to me time and time again. It doesn't matter the challenge, we can be confident in the fact that God, and His plan, can be trusted. Choosing joy!

December 17, 2018 - Loss of a child

This is a special time of year; so many memories are created. But for some, it is a very difficult time. This year, we have had friends and family members experience the loss of a child. 

I can’t imagine how painful this is, especially at Christmas. You are in my thoughts and prayers!

Dear Newly Bereaved Parent

December 12, 2018 - Joy versus Worry

“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.” Philippians‬ ‭4:6‬ ‭NLT‬‬

I have read this verse hundreds, if not thousands, of times, and I love it. But when I read it today, two words stood out so clearly. ANYTHING and EVERYTHING. 

If you’re like me, it doesn’t come naturally to not worry at all - there’s always something on our minds!! I don’t know when we stop worr.... being concerned for our children - it can feel like the responsible thing for us to do!! 

Pastor Patrick spoke about Joy this weekend - and I was thinking as I listened that for me, the opposite of worry is Joy. The biggest change I have experienced this year is a huge move in the direction of not worrying, which is a little incredible considering my health situation! 🙂 But I know it is due to the power of prayer - people praying for us, God showing Himself to be so REAL in this season, and growing in my trust in Him. What a gift!

I just want to encourage any friends who are worrying today - He loves you and He knows your situation. He can be trusted.

December 10, 2018

“An orange tree doesn’t have to try to bear oranges. A tree doesn’t manufacture oranges. Simply by being nourished, by being stable, by being established where it is planted, it bears fruit.” Bobby Schuller, Stability in a Fragile World 

“Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing.” John‬ ‭15:5‬ ‭NLT‬‬

December 9, 2018 - Joy

“I know now that without shadows, joy can feel shallow. But, when we can discover joy while in the fight of our lives—no matter what that is—it is lasting.

Today, trust when it makes no sense?

Today, seek His presence when He feels so far away?

Today, fight back with joy?

Everyone who has faced a challenge, or who knows someone in the midst, needs to know that —

suffering doesn’t win.

Joy wins.” - Margaret Feinberg

December 9, 2018 - Willifords coming home!

Kelli Williford and John Adam Williford and their family will be headed here soon. We can’t wait to see them but we know that transitions in either direction are a huge adjustment. Please pray for them as they say goodbye to their home, friends, pets, school, church and everything that is familiar. Praying for safe travels as well!!

Kelli's post:



36 hours until our family flies back to the States for one year of family, friends, and fundraising. 
Emotions are high as we say "see you later" to our Filipino family. Our children have spent most of their lives here, and though they are excited for food and fun in "Thamerica", they are also sad to leave their home here.
Since we won't be around in January, we went ahead and measured the kids for our doorpost!
I wonder what Graham will think of his big adventure?!

December 8, 2018 - Tony

AND ANOTHER THING!! 😁

I am sorry for the recent FB post overload, but I just HAD to share this. 

My husband is the most awesome human I know. 

He is a great dad, husband, pop, son, brother and friend - but he is more than that. He is one of the wisest people I have ever met. And I am thankful for his Godly wisdom and guidance in my life. 

I was listening to a discussion the other day about raising children to have a relationship with God, and the importance of modeling a relationship with God for our children. I believe the same can be true of spouses and I am proof of that. 

I would not be who I am without Tony Boyd. Most of the smart things I’m learning? And I post? Like being joyful? He has modeled that for me since I met him in 1979. He lives what he believes and he models a life that is steady because of his trust in God. He has dealt with some difficult things - and he never waivers. He loves what he does (he says “this is what we were born to do”) and it is so much fun to travel with him on this journey. He’s not perfect (I have to say that just because he would say I should) - but he is as close to perfect as anyone I have ever known. Kind and funny and a joy to wake up to! Of any blessing in my life - he is at the top of the list. 

I love you, Tony. 

December 8, 2018

First of all - I am feeling really good. Thank you to everyone for the kind words and encouragement. We have the best family and friends!

I have been thinking about something - what it is, that makes a "good" day or a "bad" day. And this isn’t always the case because sometimes heartbreak happens. But usually, it really isn't what happens - it's how we deal with it. Our attitude. Our focus. 

Whether we have a great holiday or not, is totally up to us. It isn't dependent on our financial situation, our health, our job, etc. What we choose to focus on, will determine whether this is a Christmas we look back on with joy or with regret. We can choose to focus on the blessings or the frustrations. Our choice.

I read this quote by John Piper, and it fits with this thought - and this verse - so perfectly.

"Occasionally, weep deeply over the life you hoped would be.  Grieve the losses.  Then wash your face.  Trust God. And embrace the life you have."  - John Piper

Merry Christmas!

"For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. A time to be born and a time to die. A time to plant and a time to harvest. A time to kill and a time to heal. A time to tear down and a time to build up. A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance." Ecclesiastes 3:1-4 (NLT)

December 7, 2018

“We don’t just want to read the end of our story and feel good about it. We want to take the pen and write it ourselves. We feel very certain how things should turn out... 

Though we can’t predict or control or demand the outcome of our circumstances, we can know with great certainty we will be okay. Better than okay. Better than normal. We will be victorious because Jesus is victorious...

But what if the victory is only in part how things turn out? What if a bigger part of being victorious is how well we live today? This hour. This minute.” - Lysa TerKeurst

“Therefore I, a prisoner for serving the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God.” Ephesians‬ ‭4:1‬ ‭NLT‬‬

December 7, 2018 - Cancer

I’ll be headed back home in a little while. Yesterday wasn’t a bad day - it just wasn’t as “AWESOME!” as some days have been. They did a scan of my chest, and the tumors in my lungs and lymph nodes are still there. They are basically stable - which is absolutely a WIN in the world of metastatic breast cancer. 

But it doesn’t feel like a win to me. Elimination of tumors would be a win, in my line of thinking. Feeling strong and healthy would be a win. Instead, the tumors and I are “peacefully cohabitating”. I am tired, and I need to do more planning to figure out which days I will be “busy” - because I can’t handle the schedule I used to handle. I need rest days. In this world, tumors not growing (much), stable numbers, is a victory. I’ve always known that; it just feels different when you are the patient. This takes an adjustment in my mindset. And I KNOW that God could completely heal me in a second - but sometimes His plans aren’t so simple and clear and fast. 

I listened to a song this morning as I had my devotion time; it was such a reminder that though this can feel like a LONG uphill journey, I’m not alone. And neither are you!

We have wonderful friends and family - but most of all, God is right by our side, letting us know that He is with us. Today, I am leaning into Him!!

“When I walk through deep waters
I know that You will be with me
When I'm standing in the fire
I will not be overcome
Through the valley of the shadow
I will not fear

I am not alone
I am not alone
You will go before me
You will never leave me” - Kari Jobe

I am not alone - Kari Jobe

December 5, 2018 - The Williford

Less than a week until the Willifords will be back in America!! They fly into Atlanta next Tuesday, and will be in Olive Branch on Saturday morning, Dec. 15!! The countdown is on - can’t wait to make new memories with our family and take more pictures with our sweet daughters!!!

I may be a little biased - but they are SO BEAUTIFUL, both inside and out!! I love them. 💕

December 5, 2018 - Mindy's birthday

“Her smile makes me smile. Her laugh is infectious. Her heart is pure and true. Above all I love that she is my daughter.” - Unknown

Our Mindy. Today is your birthday, and we celebrate you!! 

I am praying that it is the start to an awesome year for you, Michael and T. Dad and I love you and we are so, so thankful that God gave us the privilege of being your parents!!

December 4, 2018

Tomorrow is a travel day - headed back to Georgia to see how things are going. I had a great stretch of feeling good, but have had a rough few days. Not my plan - but as I read this devo today, I felt such peace knowing that it’s not up to me to control the future. God can be trusted and his plans are good! 

“Control is a big thing for most of us. We can easily slip into the trap of trying to control everything. Because of past hurts, we can go through life trying to control everything as a way of protecting ourselves. We attempt to micromanage, direct, and sway those in our lives. The need to control can cause a sense of panic when we are faced with something that we can’t control. This is an unhealthy place to be. If the need to be in control is controlling you, it is time to make a change. God can help you, but he needs you to be willing to let go.” - Kim Chaffin

“When doubts filled my mind, your comfort gave me renewed hope and cheer.” Psalms‬ ‭94:19‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.” Isaiah‬ ‭41:10‬ ‭NLT‬‬

December 3, 2018

I saw this picture and read this verse today - I posted each of them a few years ago. I have no idea what was happening when I posted them before, but I do know this, and I believe it now more than ever:

God is in control and He can be trusted. Once we understand that, we have a gift that nothing can ever take away. No fear. Just peace. 😁

“The one thing I ask of the LORD — the thing I seek most— is to live in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, delighting in the LORD’s perfections and meditating in his Temple. For he will conceal me there when troubles come; he will hide me in his sanctuary. He will place me out of reach on a high rock. Then I will hold my head high above my enemies who surround me. At his sanctuary I will offer sacrifices with shouts of joy, singing and praising the LORD with music.” Psalms 27:4-6 NLT

November 30, 2018

I am sometimes conflicted about the parable of the talents in Matthew 25 - until today. 

You know the one - the parable where the master went on a journey and left servants with different numbers of coins/talents. Two of the servants doubled what had been given to them. The third buried his talents until the master returned, and didn’t do anything with them. The master was very angry with the last servant - and threw him out of the kingdom. 

There have been times when I’ve thought that the reaction of the master was extreme - after all, the servant at least gave back the original talent! But when you think of this parable in the context of the talents/gifts/abilities that God has given us, and what we are doing with them, it changes everything. 

One theme that is repeatedly going through my mind since my cancer returned is, what we do for ourselves on this earth is worthless. You would never know it by the time we invest in US - our clothes, our homes, our interests. But what we do with the gifts and abilities that God gives us - for His Kingdom - is the eternal measure of a life that is well-lived. That may only make sense if you are facing your own mortality (which we all are - we just don’t think about it). But it is so crucial to living our BEST lives!

We are so backwards in our perspective! We worry and strive and try so hard to be successful, wealthy, trendy, well-liked - and none of that will matter when this very short life on earth is over!! 

God gives us gifts and abilities, not so we can win “most likely to succeed” here on earth, but so we can make KINGDOM-MINDED INVESTMENTS that will change the future of those around us. Investments of time, investments financially, investments of our hearts in the things that God places there for us to pursue. All of those things are the talents that God will measure some day - how have we used them?

“So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.” 2 Corinthians‬ ‭4:18‬ ‭NLT‬‬

November 27, 2018

I was looking through pictures tonight - these are from on/about November 27, all the way back to 2006. So many memories as I look at them - laughter, tears, love, sadness, being all together, being far apart - but in every season, I’m so thankful for our family. 

“You don't have to worry
And don't you be afraid
Joy comes in the morning
Troubles they don't last always
For there's a friend name Jesus
Who will wipe your tears away
And if your heart is broken
Just lift your hands and say

Oh I know that I can make it
I know that I can stand
No matter what may come my way
My life is in your hands

With Jesus I can take it
With Him I know I can stand
No matter what may come my way
My life is in your hands” - Kirk Franklin 

“He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever.” Revelation‬ ‭21:4‬ ‭NLT‬‬

November 25, 2018

Thank you, Libba Caballero Tullos. So perfect. 

Incredible post by Natalie Jebbia!!

❤️ Gracefully Broken! 

I was in Dollar Tree last night, and there was a lady and two kids behind me in the LONG line. One was a big kid, and the other one was a toddler. The bigger one had a pack of glow sticks, and the toddler was screaming for them. The Mom opened the pack and gave him one which stopped his tears. He walked around with it smiling; but then the bigger boy took it, and the toddler started screaming again. Just as the Mom was about to fuss, the older child bent the glow stick and handed it back to the toddler. As we walked outside at the same time, the toddler noticed that the stick was now glowing; and his brother said, "I had to break it so that you could get the full effect from it." 

I almost ran, because l could hear God saying to me, "I had to break you to show you why I created you. You had to go through it so you could fulfill your purpose." 

That precious child was happy just swinging that "unbroken" glow stick around in the air, because he didn't understand what it was created to do - which was "glow". 

There are some people who will be content just "being," but some of us that God has chosen... we have to be "broken."

We have to get sick.
We have to lose a job.
We go through a divorce.
We have to bury our spouse, parents, best friend, or our child...

In those moments of desperation, God is breaking us. But... when the breaking is done, then we will be able to see the reason for which we were created. So when you see us glowing, just know that we have been broken but healed by His Grace and Mercy!!!

November 24, 2018

This week has not been the week we had anticipated. It has been foundation-shaking, and I have struggled with anger. If I’m personally dealing with pain, I cope with it pretty well. But seeing one of my children in pain and not being able to do anything to help, has been extremely difficult. I have never questioned God or His plans in the way I have this week. But here is what I haven’t questioned - whether He is there, and if He hears our cries and cries with us. In the midst of the “floodwaters” rising in our lives, and all the questions that I can’t answer, I am thankful for the strong foundation on which our family stands. 

“So why do you keep calling me ‘Lord, Lord!’ when you don’t do what I say? I will show you what it’s like when someone comes to me, listens to my teaching, and then follows it. It is like a person building a house who digs deep and lays the foundation on solid rock. When the floodwaters rise and break against that house, it stands firm because it is well built. But anyone who hears and doesn’t obey is like a person who builds a house right on the ground, without a foundation. When the floods sweep down against that house, it will collapse into a heap of ruins.” Luke‬ ‭6:46-49‬ ‭NLT‬‬

November 22, 2018 - Thanksgiving Day

This may seem like a strange post on Thanksgiving - but I think it’s perfect! Not focusing on ourselves but on those around us. 🙂 Happy Thanksgiving!!

“It’s true that low self-esteem is one cause of insecurity. When you struggle with degrading lies about who you are, the answer is biblical truth about God. His love, his compassion, his acceptance, his affirmation: it’s all a healing balm for the wounded. 

But there is a second cause of insecurity: self-preoccupation. Self-preoccupation assumes that every slight, every rejection, every awkward interaction is about you. Self-preoccupation raises the stakes of dating, parenting, working, and serving by turning it all into a referendum on your worth. It also magnifies your flaws, because you are constantly aware of them. 

Low self-esteem and self-preoccupation intertwine, but it is crucial to know the difference between them. Why? Because they require different solutions. If you try to treat your self-preoccupation the way you treat low self-esteem—namely, with affirmation—it actually makes the problem worse. The affirmation only feeds your self-focus—and your need for more and more affirmation becomes insatiable.

The only path out of self-focus is self-forgetfulness, which is why affirming messages rarely help. In my own life, those messages didn’t pry my gaze off of myself, they simply handed me a mirror with a Jesus tint. What I needed was freedom from thinking about myself, even when the thinking about myself was positive. 

The answers to life’s greatest questions are not inside you or even about you. Whether it’s the solution to your deepest needs or the healing to your biggest wounds, your self does not have them. At some point, you’ve got to turn your attention to the One who does, to fix your eyes on the only One who can heal your wounds and set you free.” - Free of Me, Sharon Miller 

“Look straight ahead, and fix your eyes on what lies before you.”
‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭4:25‬ ‭NLT‬‬

November 21, 2018

Yesterday, Tony and I were driving down the road and trying to process the events of the day. Honestly, no words to adequately express our feelings. The only place we can go is to the Bible. To the verses that are either true all the time or they’re not true at all. We choose joy that will only come from the touch of God’s hand. We don’t feel joy in this moment - but we know that there will be joy as we lean into the comfort that God can give. 

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us…” Hebrews 12:1 NIV

“So be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead, even though you must endure many trials for a little while.” 1 Peter‬ ‭1:6‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“The LORD your God is in your midst, A victorious warrior. He will exult over you with joy, He will be quiet in His love, He will rejoice over you with shouts of joy.” Zephaniah‬ ‭3:17‬ ‭NASB‬‬

“When I said, “My foot is slipping,” your unfailing love, Lord, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy.” Psalm‬ ‭94:18-19‬ ‭NIV‬‬

“When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.” Psalm‬ ‭56:3‬ ‭NIV‬‬

“Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.” James‬ ‭1:2-4‬ ‭NLT‬‬

November 20, 2018 - Mindy and Michael

Our Mindy and Michael’s post. Please keep them in your prayers: 

We went for our 16-week doctor appointment today, and found out that our baby girl's heart stopped beating about 2 weeks ago. We are incredibly sad that we never had the chance to meet her on Earth, but we are confident that she is full of life in eternity.

I read the She Reads Truth Bible study every day. Today's title is Give Thanks in Sorrow and Suffering. I'm sure someone in addition to me is needing the reminder today that God is in the business of redeeming all things.

"We can trust Him because He has seen our affliction and knows the troubles of our souls, and His response to our suffering is to offer us freedom that can only be found in Him (Psalm 31:7-8). Sure, we can drop our heads and keep staring at the hurt. But we can also choose to respond with thanksgiving instead, knowing that every sorrow is something God has already started to transform."

November 18, 2018

I read this tonight - and have found it to be so true!! The awesome thing is the amazing way that God uses pain for good. The author of the book quoted below doesn’t have cancer. She has struggled with infertility and related issues, but her words in her battle help me in mine. No matter what we are going through, God can provide the comfort we need at just the right time. 

Whether this spring or sometime later, this book is going to be the subject of the next lifeGROUP I lead!! 

“And sometimes when you’re experiencing the Big Feels, it’s hard to let out one without letting out all of them... the anger, the pain and the humor. It’s okay to grieve, to feel a loss. And it’s okay to be happy and sing at the top of your lungs. And those two things can happen within five minutes of each other.” 

Melanie Dale, “It’s Not Fair: Learning to Love the Life You Didn’t Choose”

November 17, 2018 - MBC article

A great article about MBC (metastatic breast cancer) from a patient’s perspective. I’m so thankful for a great medical team and supportive friends and family. Not everyone has those blessings:

“When you’re diagnosed with early-stage breast cancer, there’s a road map: There are hundreds of other survivors who explain how the treatment will work and how to deal with your side effects. There’s a treatment plan with an end in sight...

But when I got my metastatic diagnosis, I felt completely alone. There was no plan, and no one to walk me through the treatments... It was staggering to me that the women who are diagnosed with the most advanced disease — the women who are the sickest, who are the most scared — have the fewest resources available.” - Lara MacGregor

November 17, 2018

"There are three things you can do with your life: You can waste it, you can spend it, or you can invest it. The best use of your life is to invest your life in something that will outlast it." Rick Warren

It was such a privilege to get to pray for the volunteers at LF Church. We are very thankful for the opportunity to be part of the leadership team at such a special church.

November 16, 2018 - from Samantha Booker

I didn't get to speak to you tonight :-( but it was so good to see you. 

About 7 1/2 years ago, I was "the one". Back in church after a decade with a 2 year old , braving the intimidating small group crowd for the first time (with a bunch of strange women, no less) . 

I remember walking into the moms group at OB (the only campus at the time) and meeting you and Mindy. I was so nervous because I didn't know anyone and money was so tight I didn't know if I would be able to afford my book and pitch in for childcare. 

You two made me feel welcome and wanted . And there were Dunkin' Donuts. I remember that , too. :-D

Thanks for being you and part of the reason we have found our home at Life Fellowship. Like most people, we have found many lasting friendships and a true family that we wouldn't have had if I had stayed scared. ;-)

Love you so much!!!

November 15, 2018

“Life is not a straight line leading from one blessing to the next and then finally to heaven. Life is a winding and troubled road. Switchback after switchback. And the point of biblical stories like Joseph and Job and Esther and Ruth is to help us feel in our bones (not just know in our heads) that God is for us in all these strange turns. God is not just showing up after the trouble and cleaning it up. He is plotting the course and managing the troubles with far-reaching purposes for our good and for the glory of Jesus Christ.” ― John Piper

November 14, 2018

“O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I’m far away. You see me when I travel and when I rest at home. You know everything I do. You know what I am going to say even before I say it, Lord. You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head.

You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.” Psalms‬ ‭139:1-5, 16, 23-24‬ ‭NLT‬‬