October 13, 2018 - Hair

SUNDAY MORNING UPDATE: I still have hair! It wasn’t all laying on my pillow this morning. We are praying that it just is heavy thinning and not going to all go away. Some people might think hair is no big deal - but I think if God numbers the hairs on our head, He is okay with us asking to keep it this time around. 🙂

SATURDAY POST

Life is funny. As we start a new message series on fear this week at Life Fellowship, it appears I may be revisiting a past fear.

I've posted this week about the great report at the doctor and the awesome trip with Mindy and T. Yesterday, these pictures were in my facebook memories. I looked and kept on going, thinking "I'm so glad that's in the past." Because with the medicine I'm on, a side effect could be hair thinning but no one said anything about falling out. I vividly remember - in response to our question about hair loss, the doctor (who has a shaved / bald head) said “Like me? No.” And my nurse saying, "We have one patient who says her hair is thinning but I can't tell it." 

I have always been an overachiever. Now they will be able to say they did have that ONE patient whose hair fell out.... 🙂

I know it’s “just hair.” But I have had hair and been bald - and I much prefer hair. 🙂 And it’s not completely out by any means!! So maybe it will just thin a WHOLE bunch. However, when you are sitting down not touching your head and a handful lands in your lap, that's not a good sign. I know. I have experience. I ordered a wig and two hats today - just in case.  🙂 And don’t even let me get started on why most hats for chemo patients are like skull caps!! Makes no sense to emphasize the fact that there is no hair on your head!! The hats I ordered have brims. But I digress...

I went back and read the post from a year ago again. The second time around, this is not nearly as scary. I know that God is so good. This is not what I would wish, and Tony and I prayed tonight that God would let my hair stay in - but I do know that this medicine is working, definitely affecting my blood count, tumor markers and lymph nodes (they feel normal) - so sometimes you need to take the bad with the good.

Right after my hair landed in my lap today, I got a “verse of the day” email. And this was the verse:

“I alone know the plans I have for you, plans to bring you prosperity and not disaster, plans to bring about the future you hope for.” Jeremiah‬ ‭29:11‬ ‭GNB‬‬

So today, I am going to #ChooseJoy. Just like yesterday and just like tomorrow!! Even on the days when there are a few tears that go along with it.

POST FROM OCTOBER 2017

Three years later

It's almost three years since I found out I had cancer. I'm including some of the pictures that most mark this season for me. 🙂 Pre-treatment, losing hair, no hair, first eye surgery, and where we are today - it's all been a part of this journey. And my boyfriend is so cute!!

I never planned to be the person who writes "deep thoughts" on Facebook on a regular basis. And I wouldn't want anyone to think that I am posting for sympathy or because I'm feeling sorry for myself. Well, in my last long post, I was feeling a little sorry for myself. I blame it on the earache. 🙂 But as I continue this path, I am amazed at how God takes my confusion or sorrow or pain and uses it to teach me more about Himself - and that is good news worth sharing!